Let it Grow
Let it grow, my melotree
Pain is a seed growing inside,
On the cold ground of solitude,
You are my only friend.
Close to you, I let it go away,
You turn my sorrow into a tree,
My misery, a melody.
“My artistic approach is set between surreal and fantasy style… in one word : Otherworldly. I never took art course that’s why I have few anatomy/perspective notions. I work with intuition to compensate for this lack of knowledge and venture into colors. I use only Photoshop CS2 and a Wacom tablet. I don’t know how to draw on paper support.
I ” try ” to avoid to go into cliches (emo-fantasy-surreal labels), that’s why I often use animals, attempting to be original to speak about ordinary theme. I think humans are proud, mistrustful and self-centered (and I am human). I want to hand over to the animals, to critic or play human roles. They don’t carry hidden symbols ; this is just a return to innocence, a naive vision of the world. This is a return to childhood, where animals can speak, dreams become reality and imagination rules the world.
I am realistic and quite pessimistic. I try to remain authentic, I don’t think myself as an artist, but a simple Photoshop user. Since I work as psychologist, I have more distance with my art hobby. The popularity makes me feel as ill at ease as the indifference. I am really impressed by the artworks of the young artists gathered on Deviant Art, I admire the job of janaschi, loish, and arcipello and many other. I am proud to be a member of the new generation but I can’t invest myself more on this way.” Cyril Rolando aka AquaSixio
It begins when you open your diary,
To write down the feeling of the day,
With the ink of your black thoughts.
Pages are changed into watercrafts,
Transporting pain, fears and secrets,
To try to get across the deep waters.
We are dancing in our chains
We yell « NO ! » or use drugs to escape reality, but we still dance in our chains.
We can try to break them, in a pointless effort, to realize we won’t be really free.
We stand the pace, we carry our story and scuff our feet in the sand of the past.
We tame our inner demons, in a dance routine, until we learn to live with them.
Inspired from the quote from Nietzsche : ” We dance in our chains ” – ” La liberté c’est savoir danser avec ses chaînes “
A long depression
– Leonardo, do you know how long does a depression last ?
– I don’t know Signora. Maybe you could begin by leaving the boat to ask some help ?
– I am too tired… too tired. I just want to wait here. I am sure the sun will finally rise, soon…
– We have been here for few weeks and look what is going on Signora. I am soaked and frozen, you are the one free of move, that really means something, isn’t it ?
– What if you try to do something ? We are not so far of the shore…
– I am not sure… I don’t want to see them. Go there and ask them for help, I am too tired…
– I can’t move for you, it’s physically impossible. It seems you are the only one to be able to go ahead
– You are boring, you bother me Leonardo. I don’t want to talk with you for the moment.
– Sorry Signora. If the sun is waiting for you, it will be far away from here.
I want to talk to you
I wish I knew how to talk to you, because when we speak, we only fight.
We share love and respect but we don’t know how to communicate.
I have followed various paths and changed my ways of thinking,
I have tried at different times of the day and days of the week,
However it is never the moment nor place to talk about us.
I am stuck because my words trigger all your defenses,
I am not a monster, or maybe we are both scared.
I need to talk to you, I don’t want to lose you,
Our feelings make noise, we are deaf.
I have precious words to deliver,
Maybe I will try to whisper,
In your slumber,
Here I am,
Asking this question is the best way to answer it.
Should I stay or should I go
I face the unknown, Hope and Regret in my back.
What if I stay ? Is there any chance you change ?
Maybe I should go ? It hurts because I love you.
Mind and Heart fight each other rather than talk.
My body is tired of the struggle, locked in chains.
I am stuck in the middle, and you, where are you ?
One more hairy castle
One more hairy castle on my road,
One more epic tale for my sword,
Maybe a new princess to save…
or a dreadful dragon to shave…
Whatever the quest I will follow,
I have a reason to become a hero !
Focus on yourself
– Try to live in the present.
– I just try to live, you don’t listen to me!
– And you, do you listen to you? Don’t be so aggressive.
– Sorry, I… I can’t do it, I feel ridiculous, closing my eyes, letting go, this is… so stupid.
Oh, don’t go ! Please, stay, I need some help…
– Your thoughts are negative, you have to leave them behind to soothe your mind.
– Hm, ok…. how ?
– Close your eyes…. keep breathing….. deeply…. and… just open a door….
– If … only… I wish I could… but I’m afraid, what if I get lost?…
– Focus on yourself now, somewhere, there…, in the middle of nowhere… find yourself…
– Oh, that’s it! I found something!… I’m quite sure…I feel it, just here, right on my eyelashes,
– Yes, I’m never too far from you. Why do you neglect me?
– I want to be perfect…and you’re not perfect….
– Because you ask too much, I can’t deal with all of the goals you impose. And, the noise of your dark thoughts pollute the air and smother my voice.
– And I didn’t even listen…
– To live in the present means to accept yourself.
– I think I get it, now… I had to get lost to find myself.
When the moon is closer
If the moon would get closer,
The Earth would be light-hearted.
Enamored, she would observe
The world with less of gravity.
Meet me halfway
I’m getting lost in your kiss,
I’m hanging on to your lips,
May I stay forever young,
If I dance on your tongue…
The glimmers of Aurora
The first artwork, from an endless serie, related to my daughter, Aurore.
Your story begins shortly after I met your mother, but we weren’t ready to welcome a new life yet.
Our love has become hard to contain, so we get married to share this happiness with our family.
Then, each one of our hearts has released a spark of life, a glimmer of you was growing inside,
Today, you are dancing in your mother’s womb, you are not so far, we can feel it under our hands,
You are the dawn of a new world, my little light bringer. We will be there to support and guide you.
It made scars in the sky
When I woke up this morning, you were already far away.
Mom told me you had come to say goodbye, but I was still sleeping.
I felt sad all day, like I do every time you leave for work.
I tracked all the passing planes, they made scars in the sky.
I wonder which one is yours,
I hope you will be back soon.
I miss you.
Train train quotidien
I knew the daily routine and all of its stops. I knew the color and texture of my coffee, just like it’s smell floating in the air of my apartment every morning. I measured it carefully every evening, it tasted how I wanted. I knew the sound of the train’s closing doors by heart. In the Reality Station, I was no longer lifting my head when I walked: I followed the crowd, absorbed by the daily newspaper. The world news wasn’t positive but my horoscope predicted a good day, so as I closed the newspaper my worries alleviated. The machine carried me to the next station, whatever its name, Work, Store or House. It took me and brought me back to the right quay. It did what I asked. I was controlling my life and I was satisfied.
The wheels of the system were well maintained, in spite of the Boredom Sands screeching under the cogs. There was always a solution: cigarettes blew away the sand, coffee prevented rust and alcohol lubricated. It was comfortable but I wasn’t dreaming anymore. My nights were empty. On the black screen a commercial played over and over for some laundry detergent with the slogan : “Cleaner than Clean”. Neither nightmare nor adventure to distract me from aquarium. Why complain? The water was clean, the temperature was ideal, I was eating at a set time and I had no fear because tomorrow would be the same routine.
So, why am I here without knowing where to go? Why did I hit the brakes? Why did I leave the train? My coffee never has the same taste, I discover new smells, flavor and colors. Sometimes it’s too bitter or too strong. Sometimes it’s ecstasy, but I can never seem to make it the same way twice. I don’t know what to expect, I don’t know how to measure it anymore or even which brand to buy. I no longer read the newspaper. I see people walking with their heads in papers and I imagine their life, their story. I forget to get off at my stop, so now I have to follow new paths to reach my quay. And I see this girl leaving the train. I am afraid to talk to her. My heart is beating in my chest. I’m alive.
I have to wake up, then gulp down my breakfast.
I pull on my shoes, it’s time to really go to work !
I am so productive but I must pick up the children !
I wish to do sports rather than making the dinner…
It’s 10 o’clock on the evening : time is running out.
I am watching the TV, near of my sleeping cat…
« You have no idea of all the things I have done,
While you use your nine lives to sleep like a log ».
He is yawning now and rubs his head on my hand.
The cats know more about the meaning of life than us.
*Animals will save the world*
I feel the danger, but it’s so attractive,
I am inquiring I know, I shouldn’t go,
I understand why Alice wasn’t so naive,
Every good stories start with a vertigo,
You lose something and run around,
Once in your hand, your self is found.
Face the unknown
Coeur de Pirate
Take it slowly…
As time goes by
Ten years ago, I began a trip, looking for forgotten message in bottles.
I went across my tormented seas, as a savior wishing to be saved.
As time goes by, I left this heavy cross to break free of my own bottle,
to become this guy who sees each second as a promise of a new birth.
A painting as a door
We don’t need to watch TV to bring our world alive.
Cross over Together
– Don’t be afraid, this is just a wave. There will be lots of others along our path.
– But I DO feel anxious ! How can you be so confident ?
– Well, we will get a bit wet…, but I have an umbrella. Just stand by me.
– Of course, I will stand by you all the while, I chose to follow you.
– That’s why, we will cross over, together.
Everyday, I grasp at very meagre hopes of improvement,
Mountains are sharp hillocks, oceans are just big puddles.
With effort of will, everyday I try my hardest to be excellent,
The bar is not higher and I am not tired of these struggles !
Everyday, I try fight with my own shadow, to my detriment…
Holding onto hope that my muscles won’t burst like bubbles.
Few words are enough to disclose you,
You lose your shield, now you are naked,
Your mind is free but you are not afraid.
You belong to me
*A petal falls*
– Are you crying? Did I say hurtful words to you?
No, don’t cry, please… be happy! I can’t bear to see you cry.
Every one of your tears is torture…
You’re so beautiful, I love you so much.
Why are you sulking? Answer me, I do everything I possibly can to make you happy…
Do you need water? I have tanks of it!
Good soil? I have trucks of it! Don’t tell me you’re lacking love…
You are the most precious thing in the world to me.
I am your guardian, your protector, the knight of your heart.
You are my life. I only have you…
– Lord Llewellyn, I speak on behalf of all of my sisters.
You saw us come to life, you gave us water, comfortable soil, and good care.
You made a place for us in your heart. But, we’re dying under your shields.
We want to see the world…
– The world? Do you know what world you’re talking about? Know that the world is selfish.
You won’t find anything there that I can’t offer you here.
You will end up in a vase, they will let you die without a care.
But, we’re afraid that we’ll never live…
A vase is open to the sky! Your bells are closed to the soil.
Let us see smiling news faces and warm other’s hearts.
Let us be disappointed or astonished by this world.
Let us take the risk of living.
– You belong to me!
– Only your bells belong to you.
All my studies
Follow Our Rules
– What’s wrong with you ? Why don’t you listen the Tree like everyone else ? Watch here – You take the paper, you read it, and you do it. It’s not that hard.
– But, Mrs. Sullivan, those things bore me… why do I have to learn them ?
– These laws have governed us for ages, they’ve stood the test of time. Your parents followed them, just as your grandparents did, this how you succeed, it’s the same for everybody. Except if you want to live in the street or like an animal. You organize them neatly, you learn them carefully, and you practice them rigorously.
– But, who’s to say that other trees don’t exist? With other laws?
– Other trees ? Other laws ? Do you realize what you are saying? Respect the TREE. Look at the strength of its trunk, much stronger than your head. This tree is the foundation of our society, protecting us from chaos and no one could hack it down. WHO are YOU to call into question our values ?
– I’m a seed.
After the rain
To get across the water,
I could draw a rainbow.
To calm your loud sobs,
I could draw a sun.
To ease your sorrow,
I could draw a pathway.
Over each river is a bridge.
Yellow is the Energy to break the gravity chains,
Red shows the Courage to face the mountains,
Orange the Wise, links them to avoid the strains,
And Green discloses the Life flowing in our veins.
No fear, no tear, not here !
Because we are young, we need to chance there,
Never mind the ground, we can venture anywhere,
The world is not black white, encased in a square,
We dream in Technicolor, our minds set in mid air.
All day long, you meet so many ordeals,
Flooding your head of raw informations…
It turns your ideas into scared animals,
Troubling the mirror of your reflections…
Your mind becomes a den for wild ideas.
On your return home, you sue for peace…
So, let night bring good counsels,
Let night sort them out and reveal :
All day long, you forget to breathe.
Home Sweet Home
This is a place where time waits for me…
I want to go home !